Role of Technology in Relationships

Role of Technology in Relationships- 21^st century

Today it is hard to define the role technology should play in a relationship. There are lawsuits over a spouse looking through his/her partner’s emails, Facebook messages, text messages, etc. There are so many new and different ways to break your partner’s trust.  When it comes down to it, your partner may invade your technology-privacy because they don’t trust you, but it may just be because they are curious.

Here are some tips for managing technology in a relationship.

1.     Try not to keep it a world of your own. Share. Technological devices can make you feel like you’re in a different world. You can get so caught up in them, it’s easy to forget what’s going on around you. If your partner sees you on Facebook all the time, or using twitter constantly, or texting away, they may just be curious as to what is going on in your own private world. I can definitely understand that you may want to have a place separate from your partner, but that does not mean you should keep everything about it from them. Share some information and let them into it a little bit so they don’t feel left out. Show them you’re site if they can’t see it. That doesn’t necessarily mean you should give them your password if you’re not comfortable with that though.

2.     Don’t make your partner feel like you have something to hide. Your partner will feel like you’re keeping something from him/her, and try to snoop on you. This will in turn break the trust you have established. For example, if your partner picks up your phone to give it to you, don’t freak out for them to put it down, and don’t be nervous that they’re touching you’re stuff. It’s not a bad thing to leave your site open every once in a while, and let your partner come across it.

3.     Don’t have your phone out all the time; don’t hide behind the computer screen. When with your date or partner, put your phone to the side. Be old-fashioned and forget you have all this technology for awhile. Although cell phones, IM, vidchat, etc, can enhance a relationship by providing constant contact, it can be detrimental when you’re together and still using the technology to contact other people. Put your phone to the side, shut the computer screen, and pay attention to your date! They will feel ignored and neglected, and may take our his/her phone in response. Two wrongs don’t make a right.

4.     Face-to-face is the best way to solve problems and have important conversations. In my opinion, fights should happen in person as much as they can. It is easy to say something you don’t mean or go over the top on the computer or through texting. A lot also gets lost in the translation in technology. Things are taken the wrong way, and misunderstandings cause arguments. If there is a misunderstanding, call your partner to clear the air! If possible, go see them! It will turn into a lot more of a personal interaction. Same goes for important conversations that can define a relationship. Wait until you can see your partner in person. The extra effort will go a long way.

5.     Don’t snoop through your partner’s stuff. Be respectful of your partner’s privacy. If you want to look through his phone because you are curious about who he is talking to, just ask him kindly who he’s talking to. Snooping will only get you in trouble and trust issues will arrive. If you really don’t plan on doing anything wrong, then just talk to your partner about it instead of taking things into your own hands. There is no reason to look into your partner’s business instead of just asking them. Honesty is key. If you feel that they are cheating on you via texts/facebook/etc, speak with them honestly and openly about it. Don’t make accusations- just talk to them about how he/she is making you feel.

The main key to handling technology is open, honest communication. The role of technology will be different in every relationship. As long as your partner does not feel left out /skeptical in relation to your technological ventures or ignored by your use of technology, technology will not affect your relationship in a bad way.
Good luck!